Hurrrr sorry I didn’t post anything on Saturday, probably no one noticed.
LAST TIME ON FIFTY SHADES OF CRAYCRAY…
OMG I LOST MY PLACE IN MY AUDIO BOOK I KNEW I SHOULD HAVE WRITTEN THE TIME DOWN. WHATEVS, I DOUBT WHAT EVER I SKIP OVER WAS IMPORTANT.
BACK TO THIS POORLY WRITTEN SUMMARY? RECAP? ….THING.
- I was able to find a spot close enough to where I left off.
- Christian and Anna, still on a date. They are talking about trust. Pretty much the convo is just Christian say ‘OMG YOU SHOULD TOTES TRUST ME!’
- Ok I really want to find out why Christian is so into feeding Anna.
- Christian: “HMM TASTE OF THE SEA” (after eating oysters). Ugghh so corny.
- Christian: “you don’t chew oysters.” Now as a fatty, I have eaten a lot of oysters in my day. I never swallowed a oyster, I always chewed them. Have I been eating oysters the wrong way my whole life?!
- OMG I NEED A PENETRATIVE WORD COUNT (Penetrative count: about 1 per chapter now I think) , THIS WORD RIGHT NEXT TO BLAZE IS THIS WOMAN’S FAVORITE WORDS.
- LOL i love Anna’s hard line of ‘I’M NOT GONNA LET ANY ONE TELL ME HOW MUCH TO EAT, HOW HARD I CAN FUCK IS A-KO. BUT FOOD, HELL NAW.’ Hey I guess we all got our lines in the sand some where.
- OMG I’m so hungry, I wish I had some seafod or at least something edible, all I have is a fucking tub of butter my last roommate left. You can’t eat butter. It’s not even real butter it’s fucking Country Crock.
- Man Christian is counting Anna’s calories. That’s….I can’t tell if it is more creepy or rude.
- Christian: “YOU CAN BE DESSERT.” Just when I didn’t think he could get more cheesy.
- Christian explaining to Anna about how being a sub would be easy, kinda makes sense. But it sound wrong coming from Christian. I guess because I don’t believe him as a dom and he comes off as a controlling stalker.
- Damn ROBO CHRISTIAN CAN DETECT PANTIES WETTENING IN A TABLE CLOTH RANGE.
- I’M DYING, THE MOST AWKWARD SEDUCTION EVER. Anna sucking on a cold asparagus and then biting off the tip. Um girl…well you tried.
- BLAZE WORD (referring to Christian’s eyes) COUNT: around 10 now.
- Christian: “OMG IS THAT YOUR SHITTY ASS CAR ANNA, HOW DO IT EVEN WERK?” Damn Christian not every one is a bu-billionaire like you.
- Anna is pretty much having a small break down about if she waste 3 months of her time banging Christian. Am I a cold person to think, 3 months time is not a lot of time, that’s like a good time for a trial dating/fucking/dom-subbing. You know what a long time is? 2 years with a shitty cell phone plan you can’t break or a bad hair cut that you have to wait to grow out.
So that was this chapter.